How charming am I?

Apparently, so charming that people love me even when I show up where I'm not invited and tell them things they don't normally like to hear.

Take Friday for example...

I was scheduled to meet Rachy-Rach, Kaddi and the kids at the activity center to do a little bowling. I arrived before everyone else and noticed the center was much more crowded than usual, but since there were still several lanes open I wasn't too concerned. As I watched a duo play Nintendo Wii tennis (I've got to get one of those) someone came up and said, "why don't you help yourself to some of the refreshments at the table?"

So I did. I sat munching my rice-crispie treats and looking around to see if the family had arrived. It was then that I noticed everyone else in the room seemed to share an similar ethnic heritate. Then I thought, "Hmmm...I don't remember anyone ever offering me refreshments any of the other times I camr bowling." On a hunch, I went back outside and looked to check for any announcements. There was a sign posted on the door that said:

"Closed for Private Party"

Just then the rest of the crew rolled up. While Kaddi and Rachel tried to decide on a backup activity, I sat catching up with Chalong. I noticed the little chubber had been bulking up big time and pointed this out to him. Normally this topic can lead to an awkward pause in the conversation, but for some reason (most likely my impeccable timing and delivery) he found this to be hilarious.

I'm a people person.

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Waimea Falls

On the final day of my parents visit we wanted to take full advantage of a beautiful day and head to Waimea Bay. It didn't go so well. The waves were so big that no one dared to get into the water. The trade winds came in and destroyed one of our beach umbrellas, then attempted to highjack the other. At one point I held onto Luke with one hand and our good umbrella with the other, while watching the tattered umbrella roll down the beach thinking "Hmmm...I hope that doesn't impail someone." As a final straw, Luke transformed himself into a crabby patty (with cheese) and decided to cry incessantly while not sleeping.

So we packed up our things and headed up the nearby canyon to a retreat called Waimea...something. There's nothing like a good botanical garden to salvage an otherwise disappointing day. It combined two of my favorite past-times: looking at strange plants and physical exercise. The waterfall at the end was very cool, but it was a good 3/4 mile hike to get there.

I got nature all over me.

We're all here for you - this is a safe place

It was wonderful to have my parents here and enjoy their company for two weeks. I'm very proud of my dad for building a successful assessment firm and grateful that it gives them the flexible schedule and available means to travel around to visit us wherever we happen to be living. Here in Hawaii they enjoyed their new prosperity by renting a silver convertible to cruise around the island. It made me a little uncomfortable that Morg was constantly pointing out how much better his Sebring was than my Saturn. I winced a little at his constant references to my being a 'professional student' who couldn't make it in the real world. But, for the most part, I just tried to enjoy the visit and overlook the various ways I don't measure up. Monday afternoon we waved good-bye as they drove their convertible to the airport.

The next morning I walked into the bathroom to discover our toothpaste was missing.

It was a surreal moment. Could Morg possibly have taken my toothpaste? Why would anyone do such a thing? My mind reeled as I tried to understand such a senseless act of cruelty. It was a brand new bottle of Crest - the expensive kind that stands upright. We spent the extra money because the kids make such a mess with the tube.
I know the extra money means nothing to a successful business owner like my dad, but for a struggling PhD candidate it's quite a lot.

Then I remembered the proverb from the Bible about the poor man who lived next to the estate of a wealthy landowner. The rich man had his friends over for a party where they all ate candy. When it was time for everyone to brush their teeth, instead of using one of his own many tubes of toothpaste (from his many bathrooms), the landowner went into the tiny bathroom cabinet of the poor man and took his small tube of toothpaste to give to his guests. I don't quite remember the end of the proverb, but I'm pretty sure the poor man got gingivitis.

I'm genuinely worried for my father. Successful people become accustomed to staying in fine hotels and being able to take whatever they want. What's going to happen the next time he stays with me, or my sister? Instead of toothpaste it might be an electric razor that's missing. Or possibly even a kitchenaid. Or a DVD player. There's no end to the damage he could do if these kleptocratic impulses go unchecked.

So I've decided to act. This year at the Strate family reunion my family and I are going to stage an intervention. We'll collectively confront my dad and explain that we love him, and we're glad he's successful, but he can't continue to plunder our bathroom cabinets in this manner. It's just not right. I'm confident that our combined love and devotion can break him of this destructive tendency.

I just hope it's not too late.

The Culture-iest Place on Earth

It's nice to have family in town because you have an excuse to take time out to all the fun things you never make time for otherwise. Friday we went with my parents to the Polynesian Cultural Center. Normally cultural means boring things like symphony's and art exhibits and monotonous museums. But this was good cultural, hula dancers, spear-throwing, and guys playing with fire.

The PCC has many different villages representing peoples from Samoa, Tahiti, Tonga, Hawaii, New Zealand, and Marquesas. We watched a documentary in the IMAX theater which informed us about how coral reefs are dying due to climate changed and made us promise to write-in Al Gore's name for President. We watched the amazing canoe pageant go by demonstrating many traditional dances. For dinner, it was the traditional Hawaiian Luau experience. At the beginning employees dug up a pig that had been slowly roasting for hours. Then I ate it. To cap off our experience, we watched the night show performance, featuring music and dance from around the Pacific.

Note: This video has been re-edited to exclude photos that certain individuals have found objectionable.

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No Three-Peat

Join ESPN'S Tourney Challenge

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Group Name: 301NIBadgers

password: Madison

This year the winner will receive the envy and admiration of as many as 3-4 fellow players.

I'm easy like Sunday morning

Last Sunday we blessed Luke in Sacrament meeting. We waited a few months so that parents could be here and it was great to have my dad with me in the circle. Luke seemed to enjoy being the center of attention, and at three months old he was big enough to hold the microphone for me. So that worked out nicely.

And somehow the day got even more special when we spent the hour after church standing out in the hot sun taking pictures. The temple is right next door to our Stake Center, so we made the short jaunt over for our photo shoot. Despite the heat I was patient and considerate of others, as is my nature.

The sea was angry that day, my friends

My parents arrived in Hawaii last week. They've been staying in a beachside bungalow and spending their days walking around Laie and enjoying the pleasures of the nearby beaches. Finally on Saturday I thought we might be ready to take it up a notch (Emeril). It was time to introduce them to the realsurf. We headed up to Sunset Beach, rented some flippers, and prepared ourselves for a confrontation with the North Shore.

The confrontation didn't last long. After Morg and I had been floundering in the water for no more than fifteen minutes or so, the ocean threw our carcasses up on the shore like two pieces of sun-burned driftwood. We had been weighed. We had been measured. And we had been found wanting.

My neck will be sore for days.

Make video montages at www.OneTrueMedia.com

All religions teach you to be good

This year I spent my Valentine's Day down at the University of Hawaii presenting a paper at their International Graduate Student Conference. UH has the East-West Center, a pretigious area studies program that focuses on all aspects of Asia. I was one of 135 presenters from all over the United States, Canada, the PRC, Taiwan, Korea, Indonesia, Japan, and yes - Hawaii.

It was my first opportunity to present some of the research I conducted in Thailand last year, in between sight-seeing trips. Last month I completed a the first rough draft of a chapter to the dissertation. It examines the Thai government's attempts to eliminate the Catholic Church from Thailand. From 1940-1944, Thai authorities banned Catholic meetings in most provinces, seized or destroyed Church property, and deported or imprisoned many clergy. This campaign of persecution lasted until 1944 when it became apparent that Japan would lose the war and the Thai decided to begin preparing for an Allied return to Southeast Asia. I argue the Thai attacked the Catholic Church as one of the most prominent symbols of the old colonial order they wanted to replace. Despite never being colonized, Thai nationalism from this era was extremely anti-colonial.

It was quite possibly the greatest academic presentation in the history of the modern university. I received some very positive feedback and interesting queries from other particpants during the question and answer session. I also enjoyed other panel sessions involving a diverse array of topics including Cham inscriptions and the resurgence of identity among Taiwan's indigenous peoples. The most important part, of course, is to get the conference on your academic resume.

Next step, revise the article and send off to a journal for rejection...or, possibly publication.


I think I really connected with other students by using their question-answer time to explain why my work was so much more interesting than theirs.

I see great things in baseball

Right now Kaddi's life consists of two activities. Providing a source of food for Luke and driving Meg and Jake all over Oahu for their baseball practices and games. I'm a little worried that her demanding schedule might be leading to over-exhaustion.

When Suzi was visiting us she forgot to bring a bottle of lotion, so she asked to borrow some. Kaddi provided an extra large bottle of Dove. As Suzi rubbed it onto her hands and arms she noticed that it didn't absorb like her regular lotion at home. So she looked at the bottle and discovered it was Dove hair conditioner. Could that be a sign someone is mentally fatigued?

On the bright side, Kaddi's arm hair has never been more manageable.

Saturday we were down in Mililani for Jake's game. The weather was cooperative.

For several innings Jake was stationed at the hot corner. Of course, in this league where kids don't really hit the ball that much, they call it the lukewarm corner.

The confident batsman.

The conscientious base runner.

Due to the intensity of the Hawaiian sun an umbrella is an essential item, even when its not raining.











In fairness, Kaddi is not the only one whose decision-making can be called into question. A few weeks ago I had to drive down to Kaneohe to get some diapers. Kaddi sent me off with instructions to get 'Huggies or Pampers - the brand name doesn't really matter.' I thought: if the brand doesn't really matter then I'll buy Safeway diapers for 9.99 instead of Huggies for 23.00.

My shoddy attempt at frugality backfired. Kaddi wouldn't put Safeway diapers on the baby, and in fact they're still sitting in our room. Instead of saving thirteen dollars, I wasted ten.

Happy Birthday, George

Many of you know me as a talented complainer. It has been a past-time that has brought meaning into my life. I can even complain about Hawaii. I complain about our apartment. I complain about coin-operated laundry. I complain about not having a car. I complain about the nearest store being an hour away.

And then comes a day when there's nothing to complain about. What's a guy to do?

Monday was just such a day. It was warm, but not hot. There was a breeze, but it wasn't windy. We packed up the chitlins and headed off to the beach Since we had Luke with us we decided to stay close to home and enjoy Hukilau.

It was a day not soon to be forgotten. Many other families were there enjoying the surf, but it was not crowded. We sat on our towels staring at the blue water as we listened to the waves. And the children played. And Luke slept.

And somewhere in the recesses of my memory rested blurred images of winter in another place and time. Bone-chilling walks home from the bus stop. Wiping condensation off the windshield with frozen hands as we returned from a friends house late at night. Trying to warm my ears after arriving at class. But those memories are worn and sun-bleached

In a few months they'll be gone.





"I think we're going to need a smaller strap"



"So, when you set your VCR to record, the television doesn't have to be on the channel you're recording..."








"No, I don't think that hat makes you look like girl"

Ich bin ein Swapper

Last weekend Kaddi's sister Suzi came out to visit us here in Laie. It was a whirlwind trip, and since it rained most of the time we didn't even get to go to the beach. No matter. It was just as much fun to stay in our apartment and watch The Mummy Returns. Again.

The highlight of the trip was to be Oahu's famous swamp meet. Every weekend they set up a huge outdoor market at Aloha stadium where you can buy as second-hand merchandise to you heart's content. As we drove down to Honolulu, all packed into the Saturn, we dreamed of the fabulous bargains we might find on stuff we wouldn't really use. I was planning to get a baseball hat with flames streaking down both sides.

Imagine our disappointment when we arrived at the stadium to find our beloved swap meet displaced by the NFL's Pro Bowl. I tried to console the family and explain that this was a good thing. Instead of wading through crowds of human roaches digging through each other's garbage, we could spend the afternoon watching the best of the National Football League sleepwalk their way through a game whose ultimate objective was not to get injured. Alas, there were no takers. Our group opted instead to spend the day at the Ala Moana Mall.

After a couple hours of browsing through the ABC stores, we decided it might be exciting to find the bail bonds location owned and operated by Dog the Bounty Hunter. But, since we didn't know where that was, and since we didn't even know where we were, that ultimate prize proved elusive. Our day has started out with such promise, and yet we had failed to realize our most important objectives.

Was it worth missing church? That is for history to decide.

I don't know what you're talking about

I'm watching Mike Huckabee on CNN right now explaining how he's not dropping out of the race because the country needs a choice.

The country made its choice, Mike. And it wasn't you.

Anyway...

Today I had to send out an email to one of my classes. I have a section with only seven students in it, and none of them seem particularly excited about history. For last Thursday's discussion I had only two students show up on time and neither of them had looked at the assigned readings. So, I sent out an email to the class list explaining my expectations, and how their grades reflect participation and attendance.

A few minutes later I received an email response from one of the students which said:

"You sent this to the wrong student. I have no idea what you're talking about."

So I doubled checked my class list, and yes - in fact - this person was in my class. They hadn't attended class all semester. So I responded explaining that they were still listed on the class roster, and they might want to think about dropping the class.

Twenty minutes later, there was a knock at my door. A panicky student sat down and explained that she'd been attending another section of 202 for over a month now and handing in assignments to another instructor. Now she realized that she was actually registered in my class. We're six weeks into the semester now. It's too late for her to drop my class, and even if she could there'd be no way she could catch up with all the assignments.

*sigh*

I should be glad of another death

This week I read Chinua Achebe's No Longer At Ease in preparation for the weekly discussion portion of my History 202 course. Although its not as well regarded as Things Fall Apart, another of Achebe's books, I found it to be a very interesting read. I highly recommend it to those of you looking for an example of good post-colonial literature.

No Longer at Ease relates the experiences of Obi, a young man who returns to his native Nigerian after spending four years at university in England. He arrives in Lagos with dreams of lifting his homeland out of bonds of colonialism, but becomes increasingly disillusioned as his idealism is frustrated by both traditional and modern barriers. At its core, the book is a tale of alienation. Obi struggles to reconcile the demands of family and acquaintances with his new position and status in the government ministry. He becomes aware that his experience abroad, along with his Christian upbringing, has made him a stranger in his own country. He loves and hates Nigeria as he loves and hates himself.

Achebe is both insightful and impartial in his discussion of how racism immobilizes and embitters a society. Obi experiences racism while in England and again from his white superiors in the government ministry. But on arrival in his home village, his relatives express their joy that he has not married a white woman. Most tragically, Obi is to distraught to learn that his family and community reject his fiance Clara because of her disreputable tribal origins. By attempting to defy these social conventions he brings disaster on himself and Clara.

Within this narrative Achebe explores the unintended effects of educating young Africans in the western model. He asks "What is the purpose and result of this education?" Obi's supervisor, Mr. Green, denounces the practice of educating Africans, claiming they only use their diplomas to grab all they can for themselves and their kin. Obi himself believes knowledge is a power to be utilized in modernizing his country, but he feels overwhelmed and inadequate at the impossibility of his task. In the end, he is slowly crushed between traditional expectations and modern limitations.

"My friends...I don't like you"

Given John McCain's recent victory in Florida it appears likely that he will eventually be the Republican nominee for President. This has set off a firestorm of debate and controversy over the man and his Senate record. Radio talk show hots, tv anchors, newspaper columnists and everyone else are now busy explaining why McCain will ruin the party and most likely the country if he manages to win the election. Some party faithful are even conflicted over whether to not vote or even (gasp!) vote for a Democract if McCain is victorious in Minneapolis. I find this entire conversation so silly and pointless that I naturally wanted to plunge right in.

For the most part, I don't have a problem with McCain in terms of policy. Anyone who tries to define the term 'conservative' so narrowly that it doesn't include John McCain is doing the Republican party no favors. The fact that he disagrees with Republicans on certain issues (although they are BIG issues) almost makes him more appealing as a candidate, not less. After all, don't we want our congressmen to think for themselves, instead of just towing the party line? I also think that McCain-Kennedy was a good piece of legislation. Immigration law in the U.S. is such a disaster that any improvement should be supported by all Americans.

The failure of McCain-Kennedy helps explain why McCain would not make a good President. Although he styles himself as a modern Henry Clay (the Great Compromiser) the bill failed because he wouldn't compromise on what became the most important issue to so many Americans - building a border fence. And the reason he wouldn't compromise is that he cares more about 'reaching across the aisle' and impressing his friends on the left than he does about the base of his own party. He now claims that he's the best qualified to lead on the issue of immigration because he 'comes from a border state.'

Well, Senator - if you're so qualified, why didn't you listen to the people in your own state when they said they wanted a fence?

Far from being someone who will bring Democrat and Republican together, McCain can be counted on to alienate both. I've watched very carefully as he's crossed the country giving various states his special dose of 'straight talk'. This involves finding an issue that's important to those states and griding it under his heel. In Iowa he says, 'Screw your ethanol subsidies.' In Florida he says, 'Screw your diaster insurance.' In Michigan he says, 'Screw your manufacturing jobs.' And in Arizona he says 'The border fence is a stupid idea, I know better than you.'

I'm not suggesting McCain needs to pander to these states (the way Romney clearly did in Michigan) but isn't there room for discussion? You think Bush and Cheney have been arrogant? Just wait until you see the McCain administation. He adopts hardline stances and then is alarmingly vindictive towards those who criticize or question him.

That vindictiveness was first apparent in 2000 when he lost South Carolina BIG and then accused the Bush campaign of dirty tactics, a charge that has never been proven. This time around, after playing the victim of Romney's attack ads for several months, he did one better with his 'timetables' distortion only two days before the Florida election. That was real hard-ball politics. McCain cloaks himself in the robes of an altar boy only to disguise how he's going to stick a shiv in your ribs.

McCain also demostrates an alarming need of approval by the media and the left. Right now he's busy using the memory of Ronald Reagan to tout his conservative credentials. But the moment he's got the nomination look for him to begin distancing himself from the right and saying 'Hey, don't associate me with that gaggle of gay-bashers, polluters, and abortion clinic bombers. I'm a maverick, I'm my own man.' I'm convinced his position on Global Warming and ANWAR represent his desire to be included in that 'enlightened' group of environmentalists. He may end up as a President hated by both Democracts and Republicans.

Finally, McCain demonstrates all the self-absorbed, self-righteous, tendencies of the baby boomer generation (although certainly he represents the best of that generation). He now uses his status as a first-rate war hero to treat others with disdain. He acts as though because he was a POW, he is above criticism, that the Presidency is owed to him. Bob Dole and George Bush both served in WWII, but I don't remember them talking about their veteran status HALF as much as John McCain. He was contemptuous of Bush in 2000 for 'serving' in the National Guard. He's now contemptous of Romney because Mitt comes from an privileged family and went to Harvard. In the debates he has this ascerbic manner of winking and chuckling to himself as he talks down to you. If you didn't spend time in a Vietnamese prison camp, you don't rate.

But it looks like he'll win the nomination. Giuliani has dropped out to prevent splitting the moderate vote with McCain. Huckabee, who seems to be running for Vice President, will stay in to split the conservative vote with Romney for Super Tuesday. McCain will lose in November, and I don't know if that's a bad thing. The strength of democracy is balance, and I think it might be time for the political pendulum to swing the other way for a few years.

Out on the Blacktop

Two weeks ago Jake started his first season of basketball in the Laie sports league. Here in Hawaii they play an unusual style, where they combine the protocol of basketball with the full contact of rugby. Jake is still adjusting to the new format.

Jake likes to get out in front on the fast break and wait for someone to feed him the ball.





...still waiting....




He's decided to concentrate on defense, since it seems easier to take the ball away from the other team than to convince his own teamates to pass to him.

I'm Mack Strate and I approved this message

I read an ad in last month's Ensign asking members to submit video ideas for commercials that the Church could use to promote the family. So, Jake and I put together this little sketch and sent it in to Salt Lake. The winners will be announced during General Conference week in April.

I think we've got an excellent shot.

Photo and video editing at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Is he still under warranty?

Meg has been looking forward to having a new baby for some time now. She is extremely excited to have Chubber Chalong in our family and always offers to hold him or help in other ways. But it's becoming increasingly apparent that she is disappointed by his performance so far. After all, usually a toy is at its best when its brand new. It's only after we've played with it for months that it starts to show signs of wear and tear and become less effective. But babies are a littile different. They start out with some quirks, then get more interesting as they have time to grow. Andyway, whenever we introduce the baby to friends or colleagues she takes it upon herself to point out all his defects. Here's an example of a recent conversation.

SHANE: Say hello to our little guy, Luke.

FRIEND: What a big boy - how much did he weigh when he was born?

KADDI: He was eight pounds, twelve ounces.

MEG: He grunts all the time because he has gas.

FRIEND: Was it a hard labor?

SHANE: I did pretty well, actually. I thought I would be nervous, but...

KADDI: (interrupting) I was induced on the Monday, and after they broke my water it was only a few hours until l'il Lukey arrived.

MEG: And he had acne all over his cheeks.

FRIEND: I think he's a handsome boy. I'm surprised he doesn't have red hair like your other two.

KADDI: It was a surprise to all of us. I think eventually his hair will turn blonde.

MEG: Then maybe he won't be cross-eyed anymore.

long silence

SHANE: Well, we better get this little guy home....

Getting the Star Treatment

Maybe it's because we've been anxiously waiting for this baby for so long, but I think we may have lavished a bit too much attention on l'il Chubber-Chalong. Everywhere we go, people makes a fuss over him, and this has caused him to be a little too full of himself. I blame the nurses in the hospital for always telling him how handsome he is - it didn't take long for him to believe it. Now he thinks the entire household should revolve around him. It's always...Chalong needs to eat. Chalong needs his diaper changed. Dad needs to sleep on the razor-thin edge of the mattress so Chalong can have the middle. What a primadonna.

The kid really lives in a dreamworld. The other day he was talking about what an incredible athlete he is. I tried to point out that just because his pajamas said 'MVP' on the front didn't really make him the Most Valuable Player. I knew I was right, but have you ever tried arguing with a newborn? He doesn't listen to anyone.

So far we've been cutting him a lot of slack because he's the new guy, but things had better start to change - and soon. He needs to understand that he's not the only member of this family. His needs shouldn't always have to come first. Heaven forbid he should do something to help around the house - maybe make dinner for Kaddi once in awhile.

I just think it's a little early for him to be acting like a teenager.

He thinks he's soooo cool in just because all the newborn chicks in Gospel Doctrine dig his Sunday threads.

To celebrate a successful nap, Chalong makes me carry him out of the bedroom on my shoulders.

We're all getting a little tired of him constantly asking us to 'check out my guns!'

Living by bread alone

I think this is why missionaries aren't allowed to tract in Thailand.

The rolling stone gathers some moss

Last night was a new experience for our family. Ever since Jakob was born we've lived a nomadic existence. Utah, California, Wisconsin, Thailand, and now Hawaii. We've never lived in one place for very long - we were meant to wander. As such, our kids have become accustomed to making friends and then saying goodbye when it's time to roll their belongings up in a hankerchief at the end of a stick and head on down that lonesome highway.

But this time we met a family even slightly more transient than ourselves - a family here in Laie for only four months doing an internship at the university. Their kids have been Meg and Jake's best friends since we arrived here in Hawaii. Since we all arrived in TVA at the same time we've been acclimating together. Yesterday we experienced the strange sensation of saying good-bye to them as they headed back to the mainland. For once, we were left behind.

The Pecks were nice enough to come over and visit even though there was usually nowhere for them to sit.


Meg and her friend were in each other's live - same class at school, same class at primary, even the same Christmas choir.


Sure, you're losing your best friend - but that's no reason to block the TV.


Chalong was exhausted by the emotional outpouring.